"A Day at the Office" by David Catney
I'm working the cash register at my job. Probably thinking about the different ways I could kill myself in the store, or the different ways that I could theatrically quit, or something fun like that. I'm scanning items for shitty customers. They're telling me how they want me to bag their groceries. I'm trying not to throw cans of soup at their faces. It's 10:30 PM Somewhere in the blur of scanning things and dealing with assholes, I smell a familiar scent. Some nice weed. I look up and there, standing in front of me, is a man with red eyes and liquor on his breath. He looks almost comatose. When I look up at him, he tells me that I look confused. I tell him that I go on autopilot the second I have to work the cash register and that when I become cognizant of reality again, it's quite a shock. He laughs and says I must be smoking some good shit. I laugh but I'm unsure why. I finish scanning his groceries and he pays. Before he walks away, he asks me if I have any weed to sell. I tell him no. I lie. Then he asks if I know anyone who does. I tell him no. I lie. Again. Then he raises his voice and says that this is some fucking bullshit. He walks out of the store. The next customer tells me that, as he was collecting his groceries, the dude who just yelled and left was repeatedly trying to sell him weed. I scan more items.