"Today I Ate a Dentist" by Meeah Williams
The dentist laid me back
in his space age dentist’s chair
and had me open my mouth
Wide, wider, widest, he said,
wide as you can go.
I heard the hinges of my jaw creak
and then give way.
is that wide the fuck enough for you,
you misogynistic sadist?
Unable to speak any longer
I said this with my eyes,
seductively, of course.
The dentist lifted one clownish size 13
and put it into my mouth.
Then he pulled the other in after it.
He said goodbye to his assistant,
who he had chastely loved all these many years,
kissed her on the cheek,
and disappeared inside me
like he was descending into a moist manhole.
The dental assistant, a very nice Asian woman
named Pam, stared into my gaping mouth
with a look of utter astonishment.
From deep inside me we both heard
the dentist yodeling back,
“I’ve been waiting to do this all my life!
I've tried my very best.
Tell my wife and kids goodbye, I love them,
and good luck to everyone!
That's all, folks!”
"I've Run Out of Ways to Say This Except..." by Meeah Williams
I write a poem with you in it
& crumple it up
& flush it down the toilet
It pops back up again
I think of giving it to a fox to eat
I think of stashing it aboard a hot air balloon
I think of feeding it babyfood & buying it a playpen
I write the poem again without you in it
but I still see you in the bleached spaces
You laugh at me like a ghost
You knock things over in empty rooms
I buy the poem a fake mustache & a plane ticket
but no one is fooled, it’s recognized immediately
& turned away at the border
It’s returned to my door in handcuffs
& given over to my custody
It wears an electronic ankle bracelet
It sits in the best chair in the house
takes over the remote
& orders me to make it a sandwich
It orders me onto my knees
It sticks in my throat
It clogs the toilet
I’m forever mopping up after it
I can see all-too-clearly how it will be.
It’s smoking in the house again.
It’s bellowing my name
What the hell does it want now?