"Work Drama" by Perry Davis
I'm getting my ass kicked.
I want work documents to be people
So I can slam their faces into my desk,
Repeatedly,
And never stop until
Everything from the shoulders up
Is turned into a fine powder
That I can mix with eraser shavings and
Dump into the trash.
I want to tell coffee
That I no longer love her and
That this relationship has become toxic.
While she tries to understand what went wrong in our relationship
I’ll try to explain that I’m trying to be a happier person, but
The past few years have felt like one long Monday
For the both of us.
I'm stapling files
And I want each file to be
A different boss so I can win multiple
World records for putting the most
Staples in a sheet of paper.
I want to be toilet tissue
So someone can wipe their asshole with me and
Flush me out of this building.