"The Cute Med Student" by Shaun Leisher
A sterile examination room
Lying on my stomach on a cold leathery cushioned table
Jeans halfway to my ankles
I cringe and seize up as what feels like a very sharp credit card pokes and prods up my butt
I had no clue this was what it was going to be like
If I had known I would not have said it was OK for the cute med student to observe
From this moment on this woman will never see me
If we meet at a coffee house
Or a bar
Or a park
She won’t see me
Just my butthole
What if we have mutual friends?
Will she talk to our mutual friends about what my sphincter looks like?
What if we are set up on a blind date?
Will the sight of me bring back brutal memories?
Is mine the first butthole she’s ever seen?
“Now bear down like you’re going to poop,” the doctor says
"Please" I say. "My pride has already been slaughtered. Don’t kick its carcass"
After he's done the cute med student hands me a tissue to clean myself before they leave the room
She must sense the humiliation
I wonder if she’s going to talk about this with her classmates
I probably would